The 10 cities with the most Ashley Madison members per capita are:

  1. Washington, D.C. 
(pop. 658,893)
  2. San Antonio 
(pop. 1.409 M)
  3. Phoenix 
(pop. 1.513 M)
  4. Salt Lake City (pop. 191,180)
  5. Oklahoma City
 (pop. 610,613)
  6. Pittsburgh (pop. 305, 841)
  7. Boston (pop. 645,966)
  8. Chicago 
(pop. 2.719)
  9. Dallas (pop. 1.258 M)
  10. Orlando (pop. 255,483)

OKAY, FOR SERIOUS, SALT LAKE IS ONE TENTH, one TENTH! THE SIZE OF THE #2 AND #3 SPOTS. It’s 30% of D.C. and OKC and Boston, half of Pitt, I don’t even want to do the math against Chicago…

Reorder those by population. I need someone else to do the math, but what percentage of the TOTAL population of Salt Lake had to be on AshleyMadison.com to get us to the NUMBER FOUR spot! Holy crap. I mean, really.

ASHLEY MADISON HAS THIRTY-SEVEN MILLION USERS. THIRTY. SEVEN. MILLION.

SALT LAKE’S 191K PEOPLE RANK #4 (please for the love of god will someone do the math on that for me?)

The problem isn’t that people are cheating. It’s that a whopping percentage of people who live in my city are so unimaginably lacking in something in their marriages that they’re looking elsewhere. An unimaginable number of people.

Why aren’t we talking about that?

Add the fact that I live in a predominantly religious place (like, SUPER religious). Over 40% of the population is Mormon. Is it just the other 60% that are on AshleyMadison? Doubt it. (Again, someone do the math, will ya? It’s probably staggering.)